Friday, October 10, 2008
My prescription for calming the world's financial markets.
Asian stock markets fell 10% last night as we Americans slept. Immediately after the NYSE opened this morning the Dow fell 800 points -- then rose 500 points in five minutes!
This panic and mania must stop! My remedy for calming world markets...
Now that the Treasury can buy damn near anything, it buys 3 billion six-month prescriptions of Zoloft (generic Sertraline) -- the anti-panic attack and anxiety drug -- and distributes them world-wide to everyone with a job and/or any kind of banking/investment account.
Shortly before doing so, it buys stock in all the pharmaceutical companies that make it.
The financial panic ends, tranquility envelops us all, US taxpayers make a profit. The world continues on its way.
Asian stock markets fell 10% last night as we Americans slept. Immediately after the NYSE opened this morning the Dow fell 800 points -- then rose 500 points in five minutes!
This panic and mania must stop! My remedy for calming world markets...
Now that the Treasury can buy damn near anything, it buys 3 billion six-month prescriptions of Zoloft (generic Sertraline) -- the anti-panic attack and anxiety drug -- and distributes them world-wide to everyone with a job and/or any kind of banking/investment account.
Shortly before doing so, it buys stock in all the pharmaceutical companies that make it.
The financial panic ends, tranquility envelops us all, US taxpayers make a profit. The world continues on its way.
